By J1 Reporter Morgan Hobbs

It’s inevitable; I should have guessed.

I counted four Starbucks cups on my way into school today. Throughout the course of the day, I managed to spot another five cups of coffee – these belonging to Scooters.

I look around and think to myself, “Is there something wrong with me? Do I have some sort of disability to not see the appeal of what’s in that cheerful red holiday cup?”

I come to the conclusion that, no, this is not some sort of weird abnormality in my brain. This is simply my mind recognizing quality content when it sees it. And that quality content comes in the form of a Dunkin’ Donuts hazelnut iced coffee – size large.

I know, I know. Who am I to de-crown the king and queen of all that is coffee in Starbucks and Scooters (Whichever owns what title, I’ll leave that up to you)? Hear me out, though.

It’s obvious Starbucks has become a staple of American culture. It’s everywhere. I see the word Starbucks at least three times a day and its logo probably even more often. Why? Well, I go on Buzzfeed a lot. Other than that, I’m not exactly sure. Sure, they release several sets of seasonal drinks that may be interesting and appealing when they first come out, but my love for Peppermint Mochas has grown dry over the years. Their regular rotation of drinks is, at best, mediocre. There’s nothing particularly special about any one of them that I wish to come back to. This is why I easily consider Starbucks to be one of the most overrated establishments on the face of the planet.

Scooters isn’t much different; I find that basically any drink there that claims to have a shot of espresso in it tastes exactly the same. The first time I delved into the world of Scooters coffee, I went with a Carmelicious and was pleased with the result. The next time I go back to try a Twix Candy Bar Latte, my hopes high for a rich, creamy, caffeinated beverage that bears a striking resemblance to my favorite candy bar. So I’m sure you can imagine my disappointment when I took the first sip and got hit with a wave of deja vu; it tasted the exact same as my previous run! I would eventually go back again to give it another a shot, this time opting for a Turtle Latte. After the first taste, I rolled my eyes. Hey Scooters, this game is getting old.

For this reason, I was more than a little excited when I went to Dunkin’ Donuts off of a friend’s recommendation and discovered that their French vanilla iced coffee actually tasted like French vanilla. Not only that, but I asked for a medium and was rewarded with a cup about the size of my face. At first, I thought this was a mistake; I was sure they had given me the wrong size. But after returning for a second trip, I realized that, nope, this was, in fact, a medium (at least at Dunkin’ Donuts). This is when I also realized how true love really feels.

See, while you can get a nice small beverage for $3 at Scooters or Starbucks, I can walk into school with some major arm candy – a large cup of iced coffee with the Dunkin’ logo slapped on the side – for the exact same price. Making a trip to Dunkin’ means about twice the beverage for me at the same cost that covers the petite little thing that was handed out at Starbucks or Scooters. Even if I decide to splurge that day-as I often do-to get a Coolatta, which is the Starbucks equivalent of a Frappuccino or a blender from Scooters, I’m still receiving a much better bang for my buck. This not only means I’m being a frugal caffeine consumer, but I’m also starting the day with a bigger cup of coffee to inhale. These two things equal a very good start to the day and a very happy Morgan.

So next time you’re falling asleep during a lecture, remember who the real morning hero is. Hint: Its name doesn’t start with a S.