Reflection by NayahMbilain

Sadness, regret and anxiousness are all feelings I would use to describe my oh-so tragic senior year, well at least at the beginning. Senior year was supposed to be a year of reminiscing, enjoying each other’s company and more before we got thrown into ‘the real world.’ At first, I was sad at the mere fact that I wouldn’t be able to see the beautiful faces of Marian in the halls every day or giggle about something stupid that happened during the school day with my classmates. Then I realized that this could be a time for me to grow in ways I never had time to grow. After three weeks of being quarantined in my house, I began to feel bursts of joy, happiness and freedom. This was a shock to me because I would’ve thought I’d feel depressed by now.

COVID-19 has been bittersweet for me. It’s allowed me to learn new skills like knitting and cooking, as well as cleaning up my makeup skills. On the other hand, it’s also robbed me of so many things I was looking forward to since my freshman year of high school. As soon as I heard our prom was cancelled it didn’t affect me much, but then I sat on the idea of what could’ve been. This year I was excited to pop out with my friends and dress elegantly one last time in our youth. I was ready to enjoy mine and my friends’ proms and look back to grin-inducing memories. The fact that prom wasn’t happening didn’t make me feel discouraged, it was the thought of what it could have been. I had been planning my custom-made dress since freshman year. I’d been sketching, piecing and adding designs and styles all the way up till 2020 and had been awaiting this event to come. 

Shockingly prom was not the biggest punch in the throat. It was senior retreat. Oddly enough, I didn’t realize how much I was looking forward to this freshman year-like event. As soon as I saw a notification in the airport from Mrs. Sullivan regarding senior retreat, I knew it couldn’t be good information. I read that if they decided to hold the event later on, that it would be optional. As soon as I read the word optional my heart began to ache. I knew that if it was optional then not everyone would try to make an effort to go and I wouldn’t see our class united for one last time. Although it doesn’t matter to some people, I love events like senior retreat because I never know when I’m going to see those same people again…being seniors and all. 

Overall, COVID-19 cheated us out of memories we will never get back, and our most important and memorable parts of our high school experience. If I could change anything about the virus, I would want it to affect the first semester and allow us to prosper in the second semester or totally eliminate it! It’s not fun staying at home 24/7, but you forget about the outside and get used to it.