Zodiac? More like zodi-wack

by Sofy Herrera

sofy bw.jpgOne of two things has happened in my lifetime: either my parents lied to me about the date of my birth, or zodiac signs are a hoax. The latter must be true. I am not an Aquarius.

Don’t get me wrong, I love space. As a child I wanted to be an astronaut and live on Mars (this was actually last year, but for storytelling purposes we will give it the vague timespan of childhood). Anyways, space is an absolute fascinating topic that cannot and will not ever be fully discovered. For this reason I respect zodiac signs and think they’re pretty cool, but horribly irrelevant to my life.

It’s true that I like the number 7, Saturdays and intellectual conversations, but in the long run I bet I could find at least 3-8 million other non-Aquarius girls who feel the same. It seems as though little to none of the other characteristics fit me. When I read that I supposedly “perceive the future well” and most likely know what path I want to follow, I chuckled to myself. I can’t even decide which road to take to school and end up driving a different way daily.

For me to truly fit an Aquarius stereotype or wholeheartedly believe in zodiac signs, I’d definitely need more solid proof. The saying that I’m sure your mother has used on you at least once, “If your friend jumped off of a bridge, would you too?” holds to be evidently accurate in this situation. Think for yourself. If your horoscope says today is going to be bad day you better try your mightiest to make it an extra good day.

So, allow me to let you in on a little secret: don’t fall for it. Create your own personality and stop being constrained to pre-existing set of conditions. Unfollow that Twitter account that claims you’re most likely to like Fruit Loops over Cheerios (where you then proceed to internally debate for .2 seconds and then convince yourself you like Fruit Loops over Cheerios even though you don’t and think to yourself ‘wow…sofy bwaccurate’).

My point isn’t that I hate zodiac signs. My point is that paving your own path is important, even if you’re not into construction. Just because you relate to something that you saw on Twitter doesn’t mean it is directed at you; it’s directed to the general public to be coined ‘relatable’ (that’s why there are 200k retweets).

The idea is intriguing, but the information is inaccurate. The characteristics could be applied to almost anyone and their mother. If you do not believe me (and you should, Aquariuses are supposedly very convincing) just look it up. All of the characteristics are the same; only worded differently. You’ll find it to be very similar to the famous vine of the lady reporting on a fire in the Bronx.

So hear me loud and clear; do not let zodiacs define your life, because if they do, you are most likely predictable (aka, a GEMINI).


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